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Nicholas Kaufman Discovers New Law of Physics: ICC Warrants Must Wait for Defense Feelings to Be Resolved

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Louis ‘Barok’ Biraogo

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Nicholas Kaufman Discovers New Law of Physics: ICC Warrants Must Wait for Defense Feelings to Be Resolved
Next Week on Defense TV: “How to Delay Justice by Calling It Illogical for Ten Easy Installments”

By Louis “Barok” C. Biraogo — December 10, 2025

Good evening, mga ka-kweba—except, of course, for the lawyers pretending they’ve never read the Rome Statute.

We are now in Act V of the most expensive telenovela on the planet: “Duterte in The Hague, Bato in Hiding, and the Entire Government in Denial.” In the latest episode, imported defense counsel Nicholas Kaufman—looking like he walked off the set of the Netflix limited series How to Defend the Undefendable—declared that it would “defy prosecutorial logic” for the International Criminal Court (ICC) to issue new arrest warrants while jurisdictional appeals in the Duterte case are still pending (GMA News Online, 8 Dec. 2025).

And I, your humble cave-dweller of truth, can only laugh.
Because the only “logic” being defied here is the logic of men who believe they will never be handcuffed.

The “Logic” That Only Exists in a Defense Lawyer’s Fever Dream

Let us say it plainly, so no one gets lost in the fog:

There is no provision in the Rome Statute—not Article 58, not Article 19, not even Article 1—that says, “Hold off on warrants for co-accused because the main guy still has an appeal.” None. Zero. Zilch.

The ICC issued warrants against Omar al-Bashir while Darfur jurisdictional challenges were still live. It issued warrants in the Kenya PEV cases while admissibility appeals were pending. And now, just because Nicholas Kaufman—apparently renting billboards along EDSA screaming “Unfair!”—says so, the Pre-Trial Chamber is supposed to freeze?

No.
The only logic being violated here is the logic that lets powerful men believe they are above the law.

“Prof. Kaufman’s master class: How to pause gravity… if gravity were accountability.”

The Cast of Clowns (Sorry, Dignitaries)

  • Nicholas Kaufman – the learned counsel pretending Article 58 needs a final appellate blessing before it can be used. Or maybe he knows better and is just paid to pretend. Either way, his press releases aren’t legal arguments; they’re smoke machines.
  • Ombudsman Jesus Crispin “Boying” Remulla – overnight prophet of ICC warrants. He “saw a copy.” Not official, mind you, but he saw it. Like spotting a ghost in Malacañang. When the Department of Justice (DOJ) and Department of the Interior and Local Government (DILG) were asked, they said nothing had been received. So either the ICC Registry has a photocopier, or Boying has unlocked a new talent: clairvoyance.
  • Harry Roque – former spokesman turned spokesman for whatever version of truth Duterte needs today. One day there’s a warrant, the next day there isn’t. Consistency is his brand—consistently incoherent.
  • DOJ and DILG – virtuosos of the technical truth. “We have not received anything official.” Correct. It might be in the spam folder. Or in the old allies’ WhatsApp group.
  • And the star of our show… Senator Ronald “Bato” dela Rosa – missing from the Senate for almost a month. Official reason? “Personal matters.” Translation: “There might be a cop outside my house holding an ICC envelope.”

The Legal Abyss: Where Sovereignty Goes to Die

On one side: a former president already detained in The Hague.
On the other: a government still shouting “The ICC has no jurisdiction!” while quietly sending lawyers to observe proceedings.

Supreme Court docket G.R. No. 278747—the slowest train wreck in Philippine legal history—keeps pretending there’s still a live “sovereignty issue.” News flash: the 2019 withdrawal is not retroactive. Crimes committed before withdrawal remain within ICC reach. And Article 27 of the Rome Statute is crystal clear: no immunity, even if you used to be president.

Meanwhile, domestically, drug-war killings are supposedly just “murder” under Article 248 of the Revised Penal Code—reclusión perpetua at most. But when the body count hits thousands, becomes systematic, and is backed by state policy, it morphs into crimes against humanity under Article 7.
The gap between the “nanlaban” fairy tale and international law isn’t just wide—it’s as vast as the egos defending the drug war.

Three Possible Endings to This National Telenovela

  1. The Just Ending – The warrant arrives, Bato surrenders (or gets nabbed at NAIA pretending to be a tourist), and we finally learn that “complementarity” is not a magic spell that erases inaction.
  2. The Tragic-Farcical Ending – The Philippines refuses the warrant, becomes the Sudan of Southeast Asia, and everyone gets tried in absentia. Bonus scene: Bato taking selfies in Bilibid saying, “Safer here than in The Hague.”
  3. The Classic Pinoy Ending – We wait fifteen years for the Supreme Court, administrations change three times, and the thousands of dead become a historical footnote. Because, you know, “moving on.”

The Biraogo Verdict

To the ICC:

Ignore the noise. Your logic is the logic of justice, not convenience. Issue every last warrant.

To the Philippine Government:

Pick a lane. If you truly reject the ICC, say it loudly and face the consequences. But this half-defiance, half-cooperation, half-leak dance is embarrassing for a nation with our history.

To the Filipino People:

Stop obsessing over “how Remulla found out” and start asking “why are thousands still dead without justice?” The warrant is just the symptom. Impunity is the disease.

And to Atty. Nicholas Kaufman

Thanks for the entertainment. But next time, before you say the ICC “defies logic,” try reading Article 58 first.

Because the only thing that truly defies logic here
is the belief that powerful men will never be held to account.

Stay tuned for the next episode.
I promise it will be even more hilarious.

– Barok

Key Citations (MLA 9th Edition)

Louis ‘Barok‘ C. Biraogo

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